how much will old age suck?

i see all the troubles my mom is going through and it really makes me dread getting old. hip problems, knee problems (my dad has them too), and a family history of back problems are on my horizon. high cholesterol and high blood pressure are thrown in there too. oh, and the joys of menopause. although the current joys of menstruation are too numerous to be mentioned here, too. at times i think the best part of my life was before 5th grade when i had to start wearing a bra. it all went downhill from there.

i'm feeling pretty good these days, ironically. with the weight gone, i'm being a little activity junkie...dancing around the house, jumping on the trampoline, roller blading down the street with reese next to me on her bike (which was really a nice mommy-daughter moment last night), running the 2 blocks back from the bus stop in the morning, chasing the kids around the backyard...it just feels good to be moving. a year ago i thought i was too old (or too fat) to enjoy moving. how sad is that? my daily amount of exercise included walking around the house, going up & down the stairs, and getting fired up about cade's tantrums (although that surely burned about 300 calories per tantrum :)). i can't believe i wasted so much time being sedentary. :(

my knees still creak & pop and my hips hurt here & there though. so i guess that's something to mention to my doctor at my next exam, to see if there's anything she suggests for prevention. some wonder vitamin or supplement, maybe. i don't want to be where my mother is in 29 years. maybe that's the most valuable lesson she's taught me? i hate to put it like that, but i don't want to take my health for granted any more. and i don't want to be facing hip replacement surgery at age 50 (she's been in hip pain for the last 10 years).

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on recommendation from some ladies on my mommy board, i downloaded an album by colbie caillat (which rhymes with "ballet", i just saw that!). i feel like i'm listening to the full soundtrack of 'greys anatomy' but i like it. nice soothing stuff with one or 2 songs that are a little more angry. the perfect soundtrack for a grey day like today, i think.

right now i'm listening to 'taking you home' by don henley. i recall downloading that when i was pregnant with my first child, in 2002. listening to the lyrics, i sobbed and sobbed, imaging how i would feel with a newborn in my arms, the pain of labor already a memory. i have no clue what the song truly was written about but i think it could apply to childbirth.

Taking you home -
(don henley/stan lynch/stuart brawley)

I had a good life
Before you came
I had my friends and my freedom
I had my name
Still there was sorrow and emptiness
til you made me glad
Oh, in this love I found strength I never knew I had

1st chorus:
And this love
Is like nothing I have ever known
Take my hand, love
Im taking you home
Taking you home

There were days, lonely days
When the world, wouldnt throw me a crumb, no no
But I kept on believing
That this day would come

And this love
Is like nothing I have ever known, no no baby
Take my hand love
Im taking you home
Im taking you, home
Where we can be with the ones who really care
Home, where we can grow together
Keep you in, my heart forever

Instrumental (keyboard)

2nd chorus:
Oh and this love
Is like nothing I have ever known, oh no no baby
Take my hand love
Im taking you home

3rd chorus:
Oh this love
Is like nothing I have ever known, no no baby
Take my hand.
I'm taking you home
I'm taking you, home
Yes I am, mm, mm, mm, hey baby, hey baby
Taking you home

Short instrumental w/background vocals

Im taking you home baby
Im taking you home.

and now my ipod has moved onto 'never smile at a crocodile.' which is good advice.