crappy day or crappy mood...

i'm not sure which.

i know i'm highly emotional right now, and usually that comes across by being highly pissy with everyone. mostly my kids i'm ashamed to say. but it's starting to come across more and more.

things that have bugged me in the past 24 hours:

1. that smokers hang out right outside entrances/exits of buildings. can you step aside so some of us can CONTINUE breathing fresh air??? they're everywhere...walmart, the grocery store, the damn LIBRARY...hell, a grandpa was sitting in the pickup lane at my daughter's school SMOKING a cigarette on school property. i really hope the dumbass didn't litter too after he was done consuming his carcinogens. and i can't forget the lady who smoked a quick one in the supermarket bathroom and we were the next people to use it. you don't realize how strong and disgusting cigarette smoke is until you're pregnant. this is the SAME lady we saw finishing a cigarette outside the store about 7 minutes before.
2. that after spending almost $80 at subway for a sandwich platter and a wrap platter (and our dinner), i can't get a little assistance taking these big damn platters to my car. they see i'm pregnant with 2 annoying kids, yet they set the platters on the counter and say thank you and then walk away. how much would i have to spend to get some goddamn customer service?!?!? at least ASK if i need help. i probably would have refused, but at least ASK.
3. the kooky family at subway in front of me. a mom, dad and a 17-ish year old son. the line was ridiculously long (as always, arg) and the mom was standing next to me. suddenly she loses her balance, SMACKS ME IN MY UTERUS as she's trying to stop from falling, and ends up on her ass in front of me. i guess she just was stupid and fell down? whatever, but she didn't even realize she hit me (guess she thought it was the pop cooler behind me?!? you know how warm and squishy those are.) and therefore i got no apology from her. i almost started crying right there in subway b/c i was just so upset. but did i have the balls to say, 'hey, you hit me in the stomach, where's my apology?' i just took it. so i guess if you WANT an apology these days you have to ASK for it. is that just CRAP??? am i alone in thinking this? arg.
4. i'm taking everything PERSONALLY. on a parenting board that i've been a part of for almost 5 years, i'm seeing little comments directed at me. maybe it's time to step back from the boards before i say too much back...b/c honestly, they're just DIRECTED. i have a feeling it's all in my pissy little head. and that feeling makes me want to cry b/c then it's just proof that i'm loony. and stressed. did i say i'm stressed? i am.
5. the rest of my bitching pretty much just concerns people who are overly concerned about themselves and people who are in my way. there's a lot of people in both category...most of them are everyone at walmart.

and the worst part? i don't even have a husband to complain to. waaaaah. he's still gone. when we got home from the tummy smacking at subway, i had 2 messages on voice mail. i prepared myself, expecting to hear a message from rob saying that he'll be home on monday or something, that he failed the course. no, it was just subway telling me my fucking platters were done. i don't know how the hell i would have survived an 18 month deployment with rob gone.

but the bright spot in this day is that after worrying so much after the uterus-smacking, baby girl is busy rearranging herself. so she must be ok. and i have one more donut to finish off and maybe i'll be a little more ok.